Thrive Global Article by Stacey Chillemi – Original Article: https://community.thriveglobal.com/healing-hormones-and-hope-how-carolann-tutera-transformed-grief-into-growth-and-purpose/

“Grief doesn’t end — it evolves. And through it, you have the opportunity to rediscover who you truly are and create a life rooted in purpose, peace, and gratitude.”

– CarolAnn Tutera

Grief is one of the most profound and personal journeys a person can experience — one that can either break us down or awaken something within us we never knew existed. In this moving and inspiring interview, I sat down with CarolAnn Tutera, co-founder of SottoPelle Therapy, who vulnerably shares how the unexpected loss of her husband propelled her into a transformative path of spiritual awakening, emotional healing, and personal rediscovery. Far beyond the titles of businesswoman or widow, CarolAnn speaks candidly about navigating grief, reconnecting with the soul, and redefining identity outside of societal roles and expectations.

Through our conversation, CarolAnn unpacks the emotional complexity of grief and offers valuable tools to help others cope, grow, and heal. From grief yoga and spiritual signs to the power of hormone balance and the importance of community, she reminds us that healing is never linear — but it is always possible. Her wisdom, warmth, and unwavering belief in self-care and spiritual connection shine through, making this interview a must-read for anyone who has loved and lost — and is searching for a way back to themselves.

 

Thank you so much for joining us, CarolAnn! Our readers would love to get to know you a bit better. Can you tell us a bit about your backstory?

I began my journey in business with my late husband when we launched SottoPelle Therapy in the 1990s. Our goal was to bring balance back to people’s lives using hormone pellet therapy — something that was truly revolutionary at the time. After my husband passed away unexpectedly, my life shifted drastically. That painful moment marked the beginning of a new journey, one focused on personal healing, spiritual exploration, and truly getting to know myself beyond any title or role.

How did spirituality shape your healing process after his passing?

It became my anchor. I realized I couldn’t control or change what happened — this was between my husband and God. That understanding, that surrender, became my survival tool. I leaned into energy healing and began working with a spiritual healer who helped me dive deep into my beliefs, emotions, and subconscious patterns. I learned that we are not our names or careers. We are spiritual beings with complex inner worlds — and it’s our responsibility to understand and nurture that inner self.

How do you describe yourself now after doing all this inner work?

I no longer define myself by material things or roles. Now I say: I am a vibrant woman who loves to learn, grow, educate, and embrace joy. I find beauty in the world around me and within myself. And even this definition evolves as I grow — it’s an ongoing process of rediscovery.

What would you say are the first steps to personal growth after the loss of a loved one?

It’s about finding your own unique path. For me, traditional therapy didn’t work — in fact, it felt judgmental. Group therapy wasn’t the right fit either. But I found deep healing in grief yoga and attending a transformational weekend with David Kessler and other grief experts. That weekend changed the trajectory of my healing. The movement, the release, the safe space — it allowed me to start letting go of the anger, sadness, and confusion.

Why do you think so many people struggle to know who they really are?

Because we live in a world obsessed with titles and external validation. When I ask people who they are without their job, home, or family role, most are left speechless. That’s because we’re taught to define ourselves by what we do or own, not by our essence. It’s scary for people to strip all that away and face their true selves — their soul, their spirit. But that’s where real transformation begins.

What are some of the emotional challenges you faced personally during your grief journey?

Anger, confusion, brain fog, and denial were big ones. I was angry my husband left. I didn’t know what to do or who I was without him. I felt lost for a long time — sometimes I could barely function during the day. But I learned that grief isn’t something to be rushed. It takes its own course. You have to cry, yell, retreat — whatever you need to do. For me, a lot of tears were shed in the shower. It was a private, safe space to release.

How can individuals begin to identify and harness their inner strength during overwhelming periods of grief?

First, allow yourself to isolate a little — but don’t stay there. My dogs gave me the motivation to keep moving every day. Surround yourself with support, but also listen to what your body and soul need in the moment. Sometimes just getting through the next hour is the goal. Strength comes from allowing yourself to feel fully and then choosing to keep moving forward, even when it’s hard.

Can you share some self-care practices that helped you cope with loss?

Taking baths was a big one for me — water grounds and soothes me. I kept my hair and nail appointments, stayed on top of routines that made me feel like myself. I also took a much-needed vacation where I completely unplugged, and it changed me. I came back refreshed and reminded of how important it is to pause and reset. Now, I make it a point to get outside, walk, breathe, and remember that caring for myself isn’t selfish — it’s essential.

How can someone deal with guilt or regret that often follows the loss of a loved one?

You need to keep reminding yourself — it’s not your fault. And sometimes you need others to remind you too. Surround yourself with people who lift you up. Use affirmations. Work with a therapist or coach if needed. And remember, you’re still here for a reason. That alone is proof that you have more to do, more to give.

Do you believe our loved ones who’ve passed stay connected with us?

Absolutely. I see signs constantly — feathers, dreams, synchronicities. I once lost an earring in a restaurant parking lot, and a month and a half later, it appeared on top of my husband’s car. How does that happen? I know it was him. I’ve also seen my two dogs in dreams, running and playing together. That tells me they’re okay — and that they’re still with me.

What role does community play in the healing journey, and how can someone find their support system?

It’s crucial, but it’s also something you have to seek out. Start with what brings you joy. Love dogs? Volunteer at a shelter. Love kids? Read to them at hospitals or schools. Find your tribe through shared passions. It’s like moving to a new town — you have to put yourself out there, even if it’s uncomfortable at first. Join a book club, show up at your local coffee shop, smile, and start small conversations. It takes courage, but it’s worth it.

What resources helped you the most during your grief journey?

David Kessler and his website, Grief.com, have been transformational for me. His work carries such compassion, and he worked directly with Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, who pioneered the five stages of grief. I also loved grief yoga and other small practices like journaling, coloring, and meditating. They help open up parts of your soul you didn’t even know needed healing.

What advice would you give to someone just starting their healing journey after loss?

Don’t believe the lie that you’re alone — because you’re not. Reach out to someone, even just one person. A daily call or text can make a huge difference. And don’t be afraid to ask for help. Healing doesn’t mean forgetting. It means honoring your journey while continuing to live.

If you had to emphasize a few key takeaways from our conversation today, what would they be?

First, start the journey of self-discovery. That’s the biggest gift you can give yourself. Second, embrace practices that open you up — whether that’s journaling, coloring, or simply walking outside in gratitude. And finally, step back from the chaos of life. Turn off the media. Get quiet. That’s where true clarity and healing live.

You’ve done important work in hormone therapy. Can you tell us more about how it ties into personal wellness?

Hormonal imbalance can deeply impact your mental, emotional, and physical health. At SottoPelle Therapy, we focus on personalized, bio-identical hormone therapy that helps people regain energy, clarity, and joy. We’re also collaborating with Dr. Amen and his clinics to explore how hormone balance impacts brain health — it’s absolutely fascinating and groundbreaking work.

Where can people go to learn more about hormone therapy or contact you directly?

Visit SottoPelleTherapy.com — we have so much information available there. You can also connect with me personally on Facebook at Carol Ann Pener Tutera, or on Instagram @catitudewithcat. Feel free to DM me. I’m always happy to share guidance or insight.

Is there anything else you’d like to leave our readers with?

Yes — take time for yourself. Step back from the noise of the world and reconnect with your inner world. Reality lives within you, not outside of you. And never forget: gratitude is the highest form of energy for connecting with God. The more grateful you become, the more peace and clarity you’ll invite into your life.

 

CarolAnn, thank you so much for sharing your heartfelt story and wisdom with us today. Your vulnerability, strength, and insights are truly inspiring. I know your words will resonate deeply with so many who are walking their own path of healing and self-discovery.

Thank you, Stacey. I’m so grateful for the opportunity to be here and to share my journey. If even one person feels less alone or more hopeful after hearing this, then it was all worth it. Thank you for creating such a beautiful space for these important conversations.

CarolAnn Tutera is the co-founder of SottoPelle® Therapy, a leading hormone therapy company dedicated to helping individuals restore balance, vitality, and overall well-being through personalized, bio-identical hormone replacement. With a deep passion for holistic healing and personal transformation, CarolAnn combines her professional expertise with her own journey of grief and self-discovery to guide others toward emotional and physical wellness. You can learn more about her work at www.sottopelletherapy.com, follow her on Facebook at Carol Ann Penner Tutera, and connect on Instagram @catitudewithcat.